Fr. Roger J. Landry
Church of the Holy Family, New York
Memorial Mass for Jesse Reno
October 6, 2021
Job 19:1.23-28, Ps 25, Rev 21:1-7, Mt 25:31-46
To view a video of the Mass, please click below:
To listen to an audio recording of today’s homily, please click below:
The following text guided the homily:
- The first time I met Jesse Reno was April 4, 2015. Rusty had asked if I knew where there might be a quieter Easter Vigil in the City and I invited him to come to Sacred Heart Convent over on 51st and 10th, where I would be celebrating for the Sisters of Life. He asked if Jesse could come and I said of course. I had just arrived in the city a month before. I knew Rusty from various professional circles but didn’t know Juliana, Rachel or Jesse at all. As I was preparing for the beginning of the Vigil, where there’s a need to bless the Easter Fire and the Paschal candle, it became clear to me I’d need an altar server. The Sisters of Life have a general policy, lest anyone mistakenly think they’re angling for priestly ordination, not to serve, even when a priest needs six hands to do what the Mass requires. When I saw Jesse, I asked him, “Would you mind giving me a hand at the Mass?” I didn’t realize at the time that he was Jewish and had never served Mass before. He replied without hesitation, “Sure, if you show me what I need to do.” And so I taught him how to hold the missal and later to help me with the lighting of the incense from the Easter fire. For a first timer, he served like one of the seraphim. Later during the readings at Mass, as we retraced salvation history from the creation of the human person, to the sacrifice of Isaac, to the exodus and the passage through the Red Sea, to the prophecies of Isaiah, Baruch and Ezekiel, to many psalms and eventually St. Paul’s Letter to the Romans and St. Matthew’s account of Jesus’ resurrection, he paid better attention than his father and even the Sisters. I found out only after the Mass, when I thanked him, that he was Jewish. I marveled. I asked him, “But you served anyway?” He replied with a smile, “You just asked if I could give you a hand. You didn’t ask if I was Catholic.” For him it was simple: He knew that there was a need and he was happy to help.
- In today’s Gospel, Jesus presents the Christian teaching on how to live in view of death and judgment. He says that ultimately we will be judged by love. Jesus says he will take personally and never forget the way we care for others: “I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, a stranger and you welcomed me, naked and you clothed me, ill and you cared for me, in prison and you visited me. … Amen, I say to you, whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me.” Rusty told me, “Matthew 25 captures my son’s life, which was to care for others, especially the wounded people who were his friends. It makes me want to cry in a good way, thinking of him.”
- If you’ve had the chance to look at the various remembrances posted on Jesse’s obituary on dignitymemorial.com, it’s easy to see how all those who were in need of food and clothing, who were new to Jesse’s environs, who were sick or otherwise in need were met by Jesse with great compassion and generosity. Karl said, “He was loyal and generous to a fault. He would literally give you the shirt off his back.” Eleanor stated, “He was an ultimate listener. When I felt like there was no one to talk to or any one that could relate, he would be there with no expectations just openly giving of his time and energy.” Logan added, he “radiated empathy and was never short on patience when someone needed it. His life is a vivid personification of love and friendship.” Autumn said, he was the “best of good people. I’m endlessly lucky to have loved and been loved by him.” Daniel said that when he was a newcomer to Seattle, as soon as he was introduced to Jesse by a mutual friend, Jesse welcomed him with an affectionate hug, “That’s just the kind of person he was,” Daniel said. “Someone who was willing to show complete strangers love and acceptance, offering his friendship without question. He gave without thought of reciprocation.” He continued, “I feel blessed that of all the centuries of human existence I got to be alive during the time of Jesse Yishai Reno, and was privileged to call him a dear friend.”
- The last time I was with Jesse was at a dinner party at Rusty’s and Juliana’s. I greeted Jesse by name and he politely told he now was normally going by the Jewish name for Jesse, “Yishai,” or “Shai” for short. Intrigued, I asked him why. He told me had made the decision several years before because it connected him to his Jewish heritage and, whenever anyone else called upon him, it connected them to that inheritance as well. We spoke for a while about the types of conversations about spiritual topics to which it would lead. It was clear that it was a means for him to be able to have deeper dialogues with others, about spirituality, faith, history, family, roots and so much more. As another friend, Andrew, shared, “Few people find their true selves. He found himself way before [I did] and I am a bit older. He was always open and easy to talk to. I always got excited when I was in his presence. He is one in a gazillion and I strive to have as pure of a heart as he had.”
- There’s a lot of debate as to the etymology of the name Jesse: some say it comes from ultimately from the word for “man,” others that it is derived from one of the words for “gift,” and others that it means, “The Lord exists.” We won’t enter into or solve that debate, but what we do know is that it is the name of the father of King David and Jesse Reno, though young, was for many a sort of a spiritual father, who gave himself and his time as a gift to others, and was for them a luminous presence who engaged them in conversations about spiritual realities, the existence of God and the meaning and direction of life.
- His Jewish roots led him to have confidence that this world wasn’t all there is and that there was something more going on, even when people were suffering. In today’s first reading, Job prayed for the capacity to be able indelibly to sculpt in a rock that he knew his Vindicator lives and that he would stand forth upon the dust to which we return and that we would see him with our own eyes. The passion, the enthusiasm, the joie de vivre that so characterized Jesse was part of that consuming longing in his inmost flesh to see God and behold his vindication, his justice, and the peace to which it leads. This passage, as Rusty commented to me, is “such a powerful answer to anguish over loss.” Jesse was able to guide others because in his very simple way he lifted up his soul to God, as we prayed in Psalm 25. He was in the world but not weighed down by it. He was able to forsake so many material goods because he had a greater possession. He hungered and thirsted for righteousness, for the renewal prophesied in the Book of Revelation, for that new heaven, new earth, and new Jerusalem, where the one who said, “Behold, I make all things new” would help his people to see that “God’s dwelling is with the human race” and that he would “always be with them as their God,” wiping away “every tear from their eyes.”
- On September 29, as he was driving with a friend Jessica to a music festival in Minnesota, his earthly life came to a sudden end in Lame Deer, Montana. Their car had just reached a plateau on Route 212. But we pray that Jesse’s journey continues, toward that place where the “old order has [indeed] passed away,” toward that new reality where there is “no more death or mourning, wailing or pain,” toward that communion where the deer are not wounded but have their longing for flowing streams fulfilled (Ps 42). Catholics pray that the Holy Archangels Michael, Gabriel and Raphael, mentioned by the Prophet Daniel and whom the Church celebrates on September 29, were there at the plateau of Jesse’s earthly existence to welcome him to the holy city, the new and eternal Jerusalem, and lead him to the bosom of Abraham. There, surrounded by the choirs of angels, we pray that he is now participating in an unending musical festival beyond all his imaginings, where we hope and pray by God’s mercy we will see him again.
The readings for today’s Mass were:
A Reading from the Book of Job
Then Job answered and said: “Oh, would that my words were written down! Would that they were inscribed in a record: That with an iron chisel and with lead they were cut in the rock forever! But as for me, I know that my Vindicator lives, and that he will at last stand forth upon the dust; Whom I myself shall see: my own eyes, not another’s, shall behold him.” And from my flesh I shall see God; my inmost being is consumed with longing. But you who say, “How shall we persecute him, seeing that the root of the matter is found in him?”
Responsorial Psalm — To you, O Lord, I Lift Up My Soul
Remember that your compassion, O Lord, and your kindness are from of old.
In your kindness remember me, because of your goodness, O Lord.
Relieve the troubles of my heart, and bring me out of my distress.
Put an end to my affliction and my suffering, and take away all my sins.
Preserve my life, and rescue me;
let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in you.
Let integrity and uprightness preserve me, because I wait for you, O Lord.
A Reading from the Book of Revelation
Then I, John, saw a new heaven and a new earth. The former heaven and the former earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. I also saw the holy city, a new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, God’s dwelling is with the human race. He will dwell with them and they will be his people and God himself will always be with them [as their God]. He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there shall be no more death or mourning, wailing or pain, [for] the old order has passed away.” The one who sat on the throne said, “Behold, I make all things new.” Then he said, “Write these words down, for they are trustworthy and true.” He said to me, “They are accomplished. I [am] the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. To the thirsty I will give a gift from the spring of life-giving water. The victor will inherit these gifts, and I shall be his God, and he will be my son.
A Reading from the Holy Gospel According to St. Matthew
Jesus said to his disciples, “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit upon his glorious throne, and all the nations will be assembled before him. And he will separate them one from another, as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will place the sheep on his right and the goats on his left. Then the king will say to those on his right, “Come, you who are blessed by my Father. Inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, a stranger and you welcomed me, naked and you clothed me, ill and you cared for me, in prison and you visited me.’ Then the righteous will answer him and say, “Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? When did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? When did we see you ill or in prison, and visit you?’ And the king will say to them in reply, ‘Amen, I say to you, whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me.’ Then he will say to those on his left, “Depart from me, you accursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, a stranger and you gave me no welcome, naked and you gave me no clothing, ill and in prison, and you did not care for me.’ Then they will answer and say, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or ill or in prison, and not minister to your needs?’ He will answer them, ‘Amen, I say to you, what you did not do for one of these least ones, you did not do for me.’ And these will go off to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”
Here were the words of Jesse’s Dad, Rusty Reno, at the end of the Mass.
Jesse was a sweet child and a warm-hearted adult. I don’t think he ever did anything deliberately cruel. This is not to say Jesse was perfect: He failed to do his homework, not just now and again, but consistently. He was dreamer without a good sense of direction, and we worried that he would take wrong turns at trail junctions. But mishaps or not, he always showered us with love.
We remember fondly his childhood enthusiasms for pokémon and manga. We often visited his grandfather, who lives in lower Manhattan. On one visit, when he was 13, Jesse was kicked out of Forbidden Planet on lower Broadway after spending three straight days sitting on the bookstore’s floor reading Japanese graphic novels. The clerk explained, “At some point, ya gotta buy something.”
As an adult, Jesse waved off material help. He would often say that he did not need new shoes. The battered ones he had were fine, he would tell us. He refused new clothes and insisted on getting his eyeglasses from thrift stores in Seattle, where he would try on 50 or 60 pairs until he could find one that approximated his prescription.
His friends have testified to his selflessness, saying that Jesse was the person you could call at 2 a.m. and ask for help, knowing that he would come to your rescue. And many of his friends needed rescue. Often troubled and wounded, many valiantly struggled to live in the moral and spiritual ruins of our society. Jesse did his best to bind up their wounds. We pray that in some small way we helped bind up his.
Juliana and I wanted the best for Jesse, which in our categories meant being more prudent and more realistic. In frank terms, we wanted him to be more concerned about himself. But that seemed contrary to his nature. He was invariably redirected by the needs of others. He gave much more than he got. His poverty never seemed a burden to him. He received the spiritual happiness that comes from a life of self-giving.
During this time of mourning, Juliana and I have become aware that Jesse continues to give generously, even in death. This moves me to offer to him some words of gratitude for the blessings I believe he has prompted God to bestow.
Jesse, in the terrible hours and days after receiving the news, your mom and I were driven more firmly to God, the only rock on whom we could rely. Your passing from this life has strengthened our faith in his everlasting mercy. Your witness of charity toward others has helped us forgive the young woman driving the car that crashed. These graces have been great blessings to us.
Your death has triggered powerful waves of grief that have drawn us together for comfort and solace. We give thanks, now, with special fervor, for the blessing of our marriage.
The outpouring of prayer and support has been a great consolation to us. Your sister has been a dear and courageous companion in grief. Family and friends have gathered tightly around us. You have aroused in many strong feelings of condolence and union in prayer. Losing you has brought us great pain, and yet it has deepened and renewed many bonds of affection.
Dear son, in death, you have thrown a dark yet penetrating light on the blessing of children. When your mother and I were in Montana, in the agony of loss, we agreed that the joys of being your mom and dad far outweigh this suffering. You gave and received love so effortlessly. Your witness to love’s supremacy was and remains precious. And not just precious, but powerful, more powerful than death.
So, to honor the Source and Summit of love, who bestowed you upon us as a gift and to whom we entrust you in his Mercy, I would like to end with a line from the Jewish prayer recited by those in mourning:
Hallowed and honored, extolled and exalted, adored and acclaimed be the name of the Holy One, blessed be He, for his glory is above all the blessings and hymns, praises and consolations that any man can utter.
And let us all say: Amen.
To download a copy of the Mass aid, please click below:
These were the General Intercessions prayed by Jesse’s Mom, Juliana Miller Reno.
[Father Landry]
Brothers and Sisters,
Even if we walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
we fear no evil, for the Lord is with us
with his rod and staff to comfort us.
With faith, we turn to Him and ask.
- In gratitude for Jesse’s life and virtues: that by the mercies of God he will dwell in the house of the Lord forever:
We pray to the Lord. - For Jesse’s friends, family members and all who love and miss him: that they may be consoled by the Lord who is our light and salvation, our refuge and our strength:
We pray to the Lord. - For all those who were blessings in Jesse’s life, his extended family members, scores of friends, teachers and mentors, and many companions on the journey: that the Lord may reward them for their goodness to him:
We pray to the Lord. - For Jessica who was driving the car when Jesse came to the end of his earthly life: that she may experience the fullness of human and divine mercy and receive the strength to forgive herself and do something beautiful with her gift of life:
We pray to the Lord. - For all those on the peripheries of human society for whom Jesse always had special concern and compassion: that God may shed his grace upon them and raise up others like Jesse to love, befriend and guide them:
We pray to the Lord. - For all those going through difficult times, for the suffering and sick, for the poor, the homeless, the addicted, the depressed, the forgotten, and the dying: that they may recognize that they are not alone, and open themselves to receive the love of God and of others:
We pray to the Lord. - And for all the prayers we have within us that we lift up to the Lord in silence [pause]:
We pray to the Lord.
[Father Landry]
Out of the depths we cry to you, O Lord. Hear our voice.
Let your ears be attentive to our cry for mercy.
Our souls wait for you more than watchmen for the morning
and in you we place our hope.
Hear our prayers for Jesse and all those who mourn him.
Lead him and us by the right paths to the table you have prepared
in green pastures by restful waters in your eternal dwelling,
You who are Lord forever and ever.
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